EPISODE: 6
How Can Physician Moms
Stop Working While on Vacation?
InspiredMomMDs.com/6
How to Set Physician Mom Vacation Boundaries and Actually Unplug
Episode 6: How Can Physician Moms Stop Working While on Vacation?
Imagine you got the chance to take a dream family vacation. Great, right? But the kicker is you need to find coverage for your patients, figure out a way to keep those prescription refills going, and reschedule clinic hours so you can leave the country.
It can be done, but what about those never-ending emails – the ones that convey a mini crisis at every turn.
You work hard in medicine and want to enjoy life too. You put in 50 or 60+ hours a week to earn a healthy income for your family. You want to take a break and travel, right?
So, you do. All be it not as often as you’d like. And how does that go for you? Are you like 70% of physicians that work on their vacation? Or maybe you’re in the group that takes less than 3 weeks’ vacation a year … even if you have more weeks available.
Today I provide insights into how to tackle this problem.
Vacation Mom with a Serving of Doctor Mom on the Side
About 6 years ago I was lucky to go to Australia – a country I never dreamed I would visit due to the length of time to just get there.
A few years back I was in my 2nd year of running our private clinic. It was still a new business and the pressure to please patients was at a peak. My husband had a last-minute work trip pop up to Sydney. If the kids and I went, the hotel and part of the meals would be paid for!
It was planned for 1 week. We worked extra hours in the clinic to get patients through right before I left, and scheduled many for the day I would return. A week was stretching it a bit with the frequency our patients needed to be seen.
So, everybody knew Dr. VP would be out for her first actual vacation since opening the clinic.
Yet, despite Sydney being 17 hours ahead of Texas, I kept in touch. I checked my email and answered questions in the evening. I was able to login to our EMR and refill controlled substance prescriptions too.
I was one of those 70%, how about you?
Add to that the guilt of working while your kids sit there in the hotel room waiting to go out!
And then, the kicker, our return flight home was delayed 24 hours.
This left me with a bit of excitement to explore the city one more day. There was also guilt and stress that we would have to reschedule a day of patients and how frustrated they would be.
Now, imagine how my “Staycations” go. Those days off work spent at home sound dreamy, right?
However, with much less outward influence to stay away from work it’s incredibly easy to get caught up in emails. I also regret the phone calls that I mistakenly answered.
But you deserve the same mental freedom at home as you would on a different continent. And this makes it even more frustrating that the staycation wasn’t relaxing.
The statistics I mentioned a few minutes ago come from an article in MedPage Today. It just put my experience into words and showed me how common this is among physicians.
In their study they report 70% of physicians work during a typical vacation day. They also found physicians take fewer vacation days, less than 3 weeks a year.
It makes you think, doesn’t it?
Why Physician Moms Can’t Get a Break
So, why can’t physician moms make the most of their vacations due to work?
- First, think about what you are gaining by logging in to work from a beach or hotel room. Is it for yourself – that you must do it all? This is another example of impossible self-standards.
- Or is it for others, to prove your value to the team, company, or patients? There can be this feeling of “They need me.” Fortunately, I was pleasantly surprised several times by patients. When I apologetically said I was out for vacation they would smile and applaud me for taking time off. Great validation!
- Then, consider what you are losing – like time. After 6 years I vividly recall working on my phone at the hotel. When finished, work stayed on my mind. It took an adjustment period to get back in the moment again.
- Losing time either with family or pampering yourself in the spa means lost memories.
- Last, working even just 20 minutes hurts you in the long run. Physically, you don’t have the benefit of relaxing. Physical stress ensues with the continued cascade of stress hormones, like cortisol. Mentally, you may feel creeping guilt over both work and family.
You have a start once you examine your motives for working and consider what you’re missing.
If perfectionism with your job sounds right, you may want to listen to Episode 3 “How Physician Moms Making Life Harder Than They Need To.” You can take a listen at InspiredMomMDs.com/3.
Perhaps the obligation to patients taints your mental retreat.
Identify where you can let go. Work becomes so automated, so rote that the idea of shutting it off entirely seems ludicrous. Pride in your work ethic supersedes personal time, even in a different hemisphere.
Plan a strategy for your next time off. You can literally force isolation – book a retreat in the middle of the rainforest. More simply, you can set up email auto replies and delegate routine tasks that you cover, such as refills. My drawback was that I didn’t delegate it all!
Help staff and patients by announcing and planning for your absence in advance. Have an emergency backup listed for patients and staff clearly spelled out.
The key is to close all loopholes where work makes its way to your vacation. Accept that you need to tune out 100% to return a better physician.
I took a trip more recently to Europe with an entirely different strategy. I placed top priority on not checking email, ignoring calls, and focusing on the moment. And those moments were priceless.
You can too.
You will prove to others you have boundaries and gain their respect. You will make more memories. And you’ll feel more refreshed and resilient to come back to work without resent or guilt.
It’s time to take control and thrive!
About Cindy Van Praag, MD, NBC-HWC
Wellness Advocate for Physician Moms
Cindy talks about the current climate of practicing medicine while juggling the roles of mom, wife, daughter, and more. She brings a fresh pair of eyes and guidance for common situations physician moms face daily. In Inspired Mom MDs Podcast, Cindy delivers a fresh perspective and actionable steps to take agency and elevate your power. Listen on your favorite podcast app!
